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Your fear, your wings

Today I woke up with one of my most faithful travelling companions clinging tightly to my gut, to my solar plexus. That lump in my stomach, that feeling of contraction that makes me want to stay buried at the bottom of the bed rather than 'face the day' and put myself in a state of discomfort, move forward despite this fear of the unknown, of 'what if I don't make it', 'what if I'm on the wrong track?

armonyah Ana sur une plage sauvage au Portugal

I've struggled with this fear for as long as I can remember. No matter how much I tried to push her away, to mute her, to turn my back on her, to cross the road, to run faster... absolutely nothing helped! I've rarely known anyone so persistent in my life! She is truly unstoppable. So, little by little, I tried another strategy... No matter what I did, she kept getting under my skin anyway, so I might as well turn things around and make her my ally, my friend. I'm gradually learning not to jump up and run to the other side of the room when she comes to tap me on the shoulder ("hiyaaa, it's meeeee!") with her big smile, super excited about this new day, jumping up and down and making a mess of my house... but rather to say "oh, hi you!", to make her sit calmly beside me and listen to what she has to say.

Because when I think about it objectively, my fear has taught me a lot over the years!

  • It has shown me that I have to go through periods and moments of discomfort to find the comfort that makes me grow and expand.

  • That it's by getting out of my habits that I can then recreate a new comfort.

  • That movement begets movement, and inertia feeds inertia.

  • That it's by moving through what makes me uncomfortable that I discover that I'm "capable", that I discover that I'm "able".

  • That the "never mind, I'll go ahead and just do it anyway" is a virtuous spiral, to be repeated over and over again, day after day after day. Like hitting the gym, it's a mental workout you need to cultivate every day.

  • That 'personal power' is not when everything is going well, but when you dare to go for it despite the moments when your mind makes you believe that things are going less well (because yes, it's only our mind that makes us believe that today everything is going badly when absolutely nothing has changed compared to yesterday).

So what if you saw your fear as your best friend, your ally? What if that lump in your stomach, that tightness, that feeling of running out of air, nausea or dizziness were actually wings growing out of your back, ready to help you fly?

Retraites armonyah sur plage sauvage Portugal

What if that fear that regularly comes to visit you, settling down beside you in bed when you try to fall asleep or get up in the morning... resurfaces in your body to make you feel the next right move, the path to follow?

What if this fear is in fact the part of you that never went away because it keeps believing?

Try it and see what happens:

Next time your body makes you feel like fear is peeking through the keyhole to invite itself in for breakfast, let it in rather than installing an armoured door. Sit her down, look her in the eye, spend some time with her, buy her a coffee and get her talking. The more she opens up to you, the more you'll feel that lump inside you dissipate (not grow!).

Life is your creation

You are the only person who can really listen to you and heal yourself. The only one able to overcome your fear and go ahead anyway, WITH it, hand in hand.

There is no one other than yourself who can decide for you if you give yourself the means.

So rather than running away from the discomfort that manifests itself in your body, agree to take on and spread those wings that are only waiting for one thing:



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